B.R.S. and a rollercoaster of emotions...

My sister McKayla had her baby.
I just am so excited to have another little nephew.
He is such a cute little guy.

 Brock Robert Shockley

With Brock's arrival,
I can't help but be in awe of the miracle of birth and bringing life into the world.
I still am fascinated by the fact he grew in her stomach.
Just incredible.







Sometimes,
only sometimes,
I let my mind go to the reality of what I will never have or do as I watch her experience bringing a new little one into their family.

But then I remind myself I just can't entertain that.


I am blessed in a unique way.
I had a different experience as Zellie entered my world.


Painful and difficult,
magical and spiritual
all in its own.


My experience is special all the more to me, to my sweet little Zellie and Kris.
It reminds me
not a single minute
of being a Mom is anything but a blessing and gift.


My friend Kerianne is due Jan. 12 and when I was talking to her she told me
"I think God loves you more than me. You never have to go through this miserable physical pain of being pregnant. You are so blessed."


It may sound corny but it really made me feel better.
I have had so so so many mixed emotions watching my sister's beautiful little family this week. 
I have no choice but to force myself to think there is truth to it.  
(even though I know God loves each of us the same) 
It just has made me feel better this week.
Oh how I love Kerianne. 
Everyone should have a "Kerianne" in their life. :)
She always seems to say something perfect in the moment even if she doesn't know it.



This week especially,
as I reflect back to the day we got our baby Z,
now more than ever,
it seems an even greater miracle that sweet Christina and Coedy were able to let my little girl out of their lives and into mine.

Cousin Photo's

For Christmas the family decided to give
Grandma Wiseman
a photo of all the grandkids.


It was TOTAL madness.











Somehow we managed to get a few good ones.
The best memory of the day was watching all the parents trying to gain control of 5 little kiddos.

Merry Christmas Jane.

 

M & Z Time

Zellie had a visitor over the holidays.
Her little cousin Maxwell.
(he is 5 months younger)

She LOVED having him here,
along with his toys.
ha ha ha

Paul and I got the two little cousins in the bath together.
It was hilarious.

We loved having them here and
I am excited to watch the two of them grow up together.

KMT Party

Karl Malone treated us to night at Planet Play in Draper
for Christmas.

We three Wiseman's had a great time goofing off.
I think Zellie loved it most of all.
Between sensory overload and all the fun things to do,
we saw a whole new side of little Zellie Zoo.
She was into everything.

Once she got the hang of the little slide she just couldn't get enough of it.
I just wanted to kiss her up as I watched her laugh and play.

Last Christmas I would have never dreamed of the fun and happiness that the news of her coming to our family really meant.
She really makes every moment mean something.
Every moment with her is in need of a mental snapshot
and
one I want to cherish
and
NEVER FORGET

She brings smiles to our faces and I never knew my heart could grow this much.
This Christmas all I can think about is how there is no greater gift in this world than my little Zellie Abigail.

I love her soooooooo much.

Holiday Fun!

Kris works oodles.
So when he is off we try to take advantage of having him all to ourselves.
So today (Dec the 13th) we packed in the fun.

We hooked Zellie Zoo up with her first Boston hat.
(oh wait...shhhhhh it is for Christmas!)
She couldn't look any cuter.
Best part is she likes wearing it!

Then we trekked to the Aquarium
Little Z loves checking out the fish,
and we love watching her check out the fish.
(p.s. The sea horses are the cutest!)

We hit Temple Square that night with our friends to check out the lights.
Got a buggy ride with the B's
and dinner at the Lion House Pantry.
It was the perfect day.
I think I am still smiling from it!